Listen more…..
2 words, 3 syllables. This is what came to me last night as I fell asleep. What could it mean?
As I sat drinking my tea this morning, these were my reflections on the message.
We need to be listened to; we need to be heard; we need to be witnessed as human beings going through challenging times amidst multiple changes in our world. We need a chance to voice our thoughts as a way to work out our reactions to what is occurring around us. We might feel differently the next day or week or month but, in this moment, it helps to be listened to.
I finally saw my granddaughters the day after Thanksgiving – outside, masked, and distanced. Their exuberance and energy were a balm for the difficult day before, when I saw no one in person. These young beautiful girls are filled with the wonder and joy of life but they too need to be listened to. Their world has changed enormously in terms of friends, school, and seeing loved ones. It took patience on my part for them to begin to open up. As a listener, I had to get beyond the ennui of the older granddaughter who cloaks herself with disinterest and boredom to protect herself from some of the fears and worries that surround her. Finally, a challenge to climb a large boulder on the path broke through her façade, just after her shout about how everyone is treating her like a baby! Her truth came out, she was heard, and a smile broke out on her face.
Others find it easy to talk. They spill out everything they are thinking and feeling in an uncontrolled rush of verbiage. As a listener, it can feel overwhelming and off putting. I usually find myself breathing deeply to resist the urge to stop the flow of words coming at me. This is how these people need to express what is happening to them. The rampage will eventually wind down and clearer thoughts will emerge once the flood has subsided. Am I capable of waiting?
Sometimes, the listener also needs to speak, needs to be heard. When a dear friend let me cry out my woes recently, I felt less alone. I felt acknowledged and valued. I felt cared for. We are, after all, social animals. Communicating our thoughts, beliefs, emotions, fears, and dreams are part of the common experience. It helps us make sense of our lives.
Occasionally, we are both the listener and the speaker. We receive an insight or perception that explains a situation or creates an unexpected solution. It is a message from ourselves to ourselves. Intuition can be difficult to pay attention to or even hear at times. We must be patient and give the understanding a chance to make itself known. We can breathe deeply and resist the temptation to ignore what is trying to emerge.
Listening is a gift. A gift for those around us and a gift for ourselves. In this season of giving, perhaps listening more is the gift that is most needed.
